The Complexion Complex

‘The ugly Duckling’ – the famous fairy tale by Hans Christian Anderson is very close to my heart. It is the story of a baby swan misplaced among a bunch of ducklings that is ridiculed, mocked and ignored for its ugly grey wings. I related so much with the story. I have a wheatish complexion and was a misfit among my fair cousins just like that duckling. Wherever I went, people would make sneer comments at my complexion. They would ask my mother; how come I was dark when she was so fair. There were comments like ‘She has good features - just that she’s wheatish’ or ‘cute girl, would have been nice if she was fair too.’ My cousins would tease me with all sorts of songs and jingles that they could think of. Ladies in the family would suggest my mother all sorts of concoctions to improve my complexion.  I felt bad and just wished God had bestowed me with fair skin.

My grandma gave me the example of Krishna who was dark, yet so popular and I would feel a little better. I used it as my defense to the jibes of the fairer breed. As I grew older, there were remarks on how difficult it would be to find a good groom for me due to my skin shade. Gradually I got used to remarks on my complexion. They didn’t bother me that much. I realized it was not the whole-sole of my personality. I’m sure many of you, who have not been blessed with a clearer complexion like me, must have faced similar situations living in the shadow of fairer parents, siblings or friends. Some people outgrow their complex while others struggle with it all their lives.

I have often wondered where this discrimination stems from. Maybe from colonial India where the fair skinned ruled us. Actually the notion originated even before the Brits came. People of superior social status were fair and those involved in manual labor worked hard in the sun and were dark. This obsession with fair complexion has lasted to this day and has spawned a multi-crore fairness business with a horde of beauty products in the market.

Even today fairness is synonymous with beauty in our country, specially for females who are ironically called the ‘fairer sex’ and maybe that is why, have to live up to the adage. Have a look at any matrimonial advertisement and you will realize that every prospective groom wants a fair bride. Things have changed to some extent in certain parts of society, maybe with lots of dusky actresses having rocked the screen. But in most parts of our country, the differentiation continues.

“I could not relate beauty to fairness. I have seen beautiful women who are dusky and wheatish,” said Dipannita Sharma, a supermodel who refused to endorse a fairness cream early in her career. I couldn’t have agreed more. My complexion is a part of my individuality and I’m content with it. Yes- dark is my color, but it is the color of my skin, not the color of my heart.